I do not doubt it... my Heavenly Father knows me well!

There is no doubting it, Heavenly Father knows me so very well. He puts a song on at the right time. He makes a friend call at the right time. He gives me a sacrament talk when I need it. A hug when I need it. And most importantly, He gives me strength when I have none. Today He was there for me; I am sure of it, 100%. Then this song came on right when I needed it most:

Tonight I smile wide, I remember better days are sure to come, I dream big and am grateful Heavenly Father is there for me, always. :)

flo.ri.da. florida.

i love it here! there are palm trees everywhere! and lots of different kinds. big ones. small ones. regular ones. this state is awesome. :) i love bring away from greensboro - i needed this! i love miami. i don't so much love miami traffic. i love the calm mornings while val is working. i love traveling with izzy and getting to know her better. (man she gets GREAT gas mileage!) i love the good food i've had. i love pollo tropical (thanks priscilla). i love the miami heat. i love that they've won twice since i've been here. i, of course, love lebron... still. i love reading the books i've been saving. i love catching up with nephi. i love singing sugarland to the top of my lungs with the sunroof open. i love have sun-kissed skin. i love meeting new people and making new friends. i love priscilla's family for letting us stay with them. i love betty's food. i love how hispanic people kiss each other on the cheek. i love jose's preciousness. i love the beach. i love the taste of the salt on my lips. i love the feel of the sun on my back - until it burns my back. but most of all, i love my eternal bestie, valerie. i love being with her. i love our laughter. i love singing phantom of the opera or lady gaga or maroon 5 or luke bryan (yes, we are musically diverse) at the tops of our lungs. i love our road trips and dancing in the car. i love sharing secrets, sharing jokes, people watching with her and most of all, sharing our time together! she may be a sore loser, and she may be a thunder fan (booo!) but she is an EXCELLENT navigator, wonderful singer, great secret keeper and, most importantly, my EB and i thank her for that. <3

when i'm 60...

this morning i went for a walk around the neighborhood and boy was it hot, humid and miserable!! i was about halfway through my planned route and ready to quit when i saw the most precious thing. walking towards me in the distance was a couple. as i got closer i noticed they were older, mid 60s, carrying on a conversation, and she was carrying a cup of coffee. it. was. PRECIOUS! i tried to listen to their conversation but couldn't hear a lot, just what sounded like everyday chatter - what they had planned for the day. they nodded and said, "good morning" as i passed, and then just continued on with their conversation. for the rest of the walk i kept thinking about them. how at ease they seamed with each other, how natural their walk was and how absolutely perfect it seemed. so, now i have a goal for when i am 60. if i am blessed with a husband at that time, i hope we wake up early, go for a walk, and can be absolutely at ease with each other! :)

i love you, momma

i was 8 years old when my aunt paulette asked me if i understood my mother was different. "different". what a word. different than who? her? my other aunts? my grandmother? yes, she was different. she was the only one who disciplined me. i was everyone else's favorite so i usually got my way. :) this, however, isn't what she was referring to. she was asking me if i understood that my mom couldn't read. that she would never be able to help me with my homework. that my aunts would always be a big part of my life because she needed their help. she was asking if i understood that my sister and i would have to teach ourselves a lot of life lessons because my mom couldn't. i nodded and said yes. i understood. truth is, i had no idea.

growing up i knew she couldn't read me stories, she would just tell me stories from memory. she couldn't do math beyond simple arithmetic. she didn't know facts about history or scientific laws. i did know she was a good woman. she was at every soccer game, basketball game, award ceremony and special occasion. she made sure i was at seminary each morning and mutual every week. she had dinner ready every night, and always asked about my days. i thought she was a pretty good mother. but sometimes, the things she couldn't do, made me sad. i wanted her to get me. to relate. and she couldn't and that hurt my feelings.

i was in high school when i was actually taught about my mother's handicap. i found out her IQ. i found out it would be very difficult for her to get past a lower elementary school level. i was so hurt and sad that no one ever told me, because now i understood more. i knew more of where she was coming from and how she learned. it was such an eye opening experience.

now i'm 26. and being mormon i've learned so much about life and eternity and heavenly father's plan for each of his children. i know how much my heavenly father loves me, and more so, how much he loves my mom. he commands us to be like children. to be meek and humble before him. how grateful should i be that my mother is that ultimate example to me?! she is a sweet spirit that my heavenly father has put on this earth to guide me and influence me and help prepare me to return to him.

no, growing up wasn't always sunshine and rainbows. it was hard and difficult and frustrating at times. and i didn't have this eternal perspective until i was well into my 20's. but it is because of this eternal perspective that i am able to focus on the positives of my mother. i love her. with every single piece of my soul. aaaand even though she calls me every day, aaaand sometime i don't want to answer, i'm grateful she cares enough to do so. i don't know that i could imagine life without her. and i don't want to. :)

and because heavenly father loves me so much, he has given me women along the way to teach me motherly things that mine couldn't. women who so simply fill the gaps. gaps i'm happy to have. because i know my mom, and she is the best for me.

i love you, momma.

<3

Excuse Me?!

two nights ago i was at wal-mart and got hit on. (at WAL-MART!) not once but twice. with the WORST pick-up lines! this has also happened at the dollar store. WHAT ARE THE MEN OF GREENSBORO THINKING?!?! (i know. they're NOT!) so, i've decided that the next time one of these ridiculous pick-up lines gets used on me i am going to turn to the ma... boy, and ask him if that crap has worked before.

gentlemen - note pick up lines and techniques NOT to use:

• "mmmm gurl you lookin' fine!" - do not EVER "mmmmm gurl" a lady!
• "yo shawty you workin' dem shoes" - do not EVER "yo shawty" a lady, especially one that is 6' tall! and don't talk about her shoes. now you sound like a chick.
• don't bump her cart with yours and say "oops i'm just playin" and then creepily follow her down the frozen vegetable aisle - you're creeping her out.
• don't roll all the windows down in your escalade, play your music and bass as loud as possible and follow her around the parking lot - again, you're creeping her out!
• "your boyfriend must be lucky" - this is so annoying! don't pull the boyfriend card. if you think she might have a boyfriend, don't talk to her. if you want to know, ask. i hate the assumption.
• and do not touch her. - nothing is worse than the "accidental" graze. keep your hands to yourself.

being a single ysa in the city of greensboro is hard. but being surround by stupid boys with crappy pick-up lines is even harder! hopefully there will be a change. and soon! where guys will just extend a handshake and introduce themselves... one can dream...

yup... it's happening...

i've said for months i should blog. mainly because i have so much to say. also because you should hear. at lease half of it is pretty interesting :) some funny things happen to me at work (i manage a 375-unit apartment community) so you'll get some of those stories. i have a CRAZY group of friends and you'll get those stories. but mostly i have the most random of thoughts... those will become your favorite ;) ... maybe ... hopefully.

so. enjoy!